week 2

[arsholes]

[One week down and (if the Alchemist's promise is to be believed) just three more to go. In the past week royalty has been bullied, explicitly non-Satanic chairs were ordered and you began the pact-bonding process with your new proprietor of mercantile wares, ✨Garfield the Deals Warlock✨.

All in all, a surprisingly good week despite the kidnapping and looming threat of death. We'll see how long that lasts.


Sunday | Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday

✨WEEKLY DEALS✨
1. The Cloak of Duplication - An ancient vampiric artifact, when worn it changes your appearance and voice to perfectly mimic another individual of your choosing. (You still have to sell the act, though.) [5 coins] SOLD
2. The Battle Axe of Hatred - A sick as hell electric guitar with an energy that feels like it is powered by the screaming of an ancient and evil lord- or at least once was. It has a signature on the body that simply says "Ron" and looks like it might have been written in blood. [5 coins]
3. The Jable - Put down your keys and stay a while. [2 coins]


✨LEFTOVER STOCK AT 50% MARK-UP✨
1. The Tingler - The whole hand tingles from wearing this ring, as if more blood rushes through the area. [2 coins]
2. Christine Jr. - A tiny red convertible. It's powered by pedals like a bicycle, with a steering wheel. For some reason it makes you think of old men in silly hats. [6 coins]



(( OOC: Don't forget to submit your orders for any threads that aren't with the Alchemist or Garfield! The Alchemist and Garfield both have "office hours" now so feel free to reach out to them. The compact functions have also been updated and don't forget activity check!

This week is where the real game begins, so get in your regains and CR while you can. >:3 ))

Comments

MOTIVE: It's a Wonderful Murder

[thealchemist]

[Well, except for those of you who've reached out to him, for the last week and some change the Alchemist has evidently seen fit to leave you to your devices. Perhaps he even plans to let you just wait out your month with no interference on his part at all.

But then... He wouldn't be a very good teacher, if he didn't check in on his students at all, would he?]

Attention, Apprentices. If you don't mind, meet me in the dining hall this morning, I have an announcement for you.

[As the apprentices trickle in to the dining hall, they'll see that the Alchemist has commandeered two of the four tables. One, the one that he's sitting on top of with his heavy work boots on the bench, is laid out with twenty envelopes, in alphabetical order.

The other is laid out with a spread of refreshments, two buffet-style heating trays full of what looks like large sheets of omelettes, one (with a piece cut out already) filled with ham and bacon and peppers and onion and mushrooms and cheese, and the other filled with all of that except the meat.

There's also a smaller buffet-style heating tray filled with sausages, a basket of rolls, and a large wooden board filled with cuts of meat and cheese, and a couple of large pitchers of lemonade.]

Alright, eat up. Call it a carrot before I bring out the stick.

[Once everyone who's going to eat has eaten, the Alchemist lets everyone come up and get their envelopes. If anyone tries to grab one that isn't theirs, they won't be able to lift it from the table.]

I bet you're wondering- "I didn't know Big Daddy Alchemist could cook. What else could he have cooked up for us today?" Well, my little babies, you're in luck. Go ahead, open.

[As the Apprentices open their envelopes, they'll find a picture of someone that they... don't get along with. Could be anyone - a sworn rival, a sibling (same thing), an arch-nemesis, whatever. Doesn't even matter if the animosity is one-sided.]

I'm here to offer you a one of a kind deal - In addition to letting you go home, or wherever the hell you want, whoever's in that picture? I'll erase them from existence. As if they were never even born. You just have to do one little thing for me first. I bet you smarty-pants can guess what that is.

[Despite the unmoving beaked mask, you can tell he's smirking. He crosses one ankle over his knee and leans over his lap.]

Kill somebody and get away with it.

[nomansbosom]

That's donked up, yo!

[Finn has, pointedly, not eaten. Fuck yo breakfast, Alchemist.]

[encelevenemus]

Honestly. Obviously it was clear you were not going to allow us to simply exist unchallenged for a month, but is this not a bit absurd to-

[As he spoke, Somnus opened his envelope and then abruptly stopped doing the former. The picture vanished in a brief flicker of light, and with it went his arrogance.]

…I suppose you think that funny, do you?

[thealchemist]

Hilarious.

What's the matter, big guy? Not feeling the brotherly love?

[replacementshield]

Or you could go straight to hell.

[ Real creative right?

Anyway he has a headache already. He's done here. ]

[thealchemist]

[In what would be almost a sing-song, if his voice wasn't so rough-]

See you there, doll-face!

[seaweedwrap]

[Wu absolutely 100000% does not want to be here. He doesn't want to be seated at this table, and he hasn't touched any of the food. He's hungover, sure, but he, uh....doesn't want these. Instead, he's surprisingly subdued and quiet, shoulders hunched a bit, and very tentatively goes up and gets that envelope when bidden. It takes him a moment to open it, but once he does and pulls the picture out and, somehow, goes even paler and a shade more sickly. He's quickly shoving the picture back in the envelope and placing it back on the table, wrapping his arms around his waist and looking like he very much wants to be anywhere but here]

[strongestfeelings]

[Stella stands beside him, at first glance above it all. The crumpled photo in her hand, and the bright glow to her eyes say otherwise.

It might be dangerous for her to fuss with his hair like this, but that doesn't stop her.]

[amitiesbind]

[ Olive is pretty sure she knows who it is before she even opens hers. ]

Bigger men than you have tried.

[ good job alchemist you RUINED HATING BATMAN ]

[cakerights]

[Red Velvet will partake of some bread and cheese, but that's about it. Meat makes him sick and he isn't sure about eggs as not part of a baked good...... And what with his hangover (what was IN that wine???) he doesn't want to risk it.

He looks in his envelope, then shrugs and tucks it away]

You're going to have to do better than that.

[reresurrected]

[Oddly enough, there's absolutely no surprise on Baldr's face when he opens his, just a sort of grim resignation. He closes his eyes for a brief moment, then quietly tucks the picture back into the envelope and shoves it into his pocket with a little bit more force than is strictly necessary, though he's careful to keep his expression neutral.]

That's quite a promise to be making, you know.

[thealchemist]

I wouldn't be offering if I couldn't seal the deal.

[rikonstructed]

[Nuadha has more than an educated guess whose picture Baldr received. He doesn't even try to glance at it, focused instead on Baldr's expression as he takes in the contents.]

[cuttingremark]

[Loki scoffs, but looks at the picture in the envelope anyways. His face is impassive as he looks at the picture.]

This is a dangerous game you play with the fabric of reality.

[thealchemist]

Yeah, well, there's a fancy rock for that too, isn't there.

[pegasinister]

[Hubert doesn't even bother opening it, instead laughing darkly at the offer]

You truly think I would lose the chance to kill them myself?

[thealchemist]

[The Alchemist just shrugs.]

Up to you. Someone else might not have the same code of honor you do.

[philomachy]

[He absolutely ate, breakfast is breakfast. He's just setting his cutlery down when it's time for everyone to get their envelopes, so he'll dutifully come over and take his.

Open it.

...And in what is probably the most emotion anyone has seen from him so far? Zenos just starts laughing.]

[spitessier]

[Katsuya opens his envelope and stares at the old man within. Tatsuzou Sudou, high-ranking government official, and ringleader of the organization he and the rest of the Persona 2 cast were fighting in his game.

The man who caused Katsuya's father's career to derail, and therefore led to Katsuya taking the role of the breadwinner of the family, ruining Katsuya's hopes and dreams]

...that man was a puppet. If he's gone, someone else will be targeted.

[He says that, but...it's tempting, if only because it'd mean Katsuya could have the life he wanted, not the life he had to follow.

Hopefully Katsuya would be able to hold his spite and resentment at bay]

[twibeast]

[ Orthrus, while a little on edge, was feeling pretty content after having such a nice breakfast. However when he goes to open his envelope that all changes.

He only gets the picture just barely out, enough to catch a sliver of a glimpse, before dropping it like it burned him and staring at it on the floor with a wide eyed fear, his face dreadfully pale.

There's no other reaction though. He just stares at it, even though the picture has fallen face down, frozen in place. ]

[predecir]

[Bruno looks shaken at the ultimatum, of course, but he opens his envelope with a sigh and an eye-roll - as if he already knows what's in it. Bruno has...well, a lot of enemies if you think about it, but very few people he really hates himself. How many options are there?

But then he sees the picture, and somehow goes a little more grey.]

What...? [He gapes at it, then glares up at the Alchemist, holding his photo up in the air - everyone can kinda see it now, oops.] This is my mother! Why would you even give me this?

[draconite]

[ Bryn eats breakfast because of course she eats breakfast. She's a growing girl, she needs her nutrients. She not quite fool enough to think this is a social visit so when it's time to open the envelopes, she can't say she's really surprised.

But still. When she tears it open and sees what's inside, Bryn completely freezes. Cold on the spot like someone's just walked over her grave. And if you happen to peek at her picture, it's hard to tell exactly why.

After all, it's just a man. Clearly an adult by some wide margin, with a face that seems kind, somehow. If there's anything notable about him, it might just be that the lavender hair and his red eyes are an eerie match for Bryn's.

She stares at the picture for a moment like she's not quite comprehending it. But then she turns her gaze up to the Alchemist and her voice is so, so quiet - and her remaining eye has gone flat, glossy, suddenly catching just a bit too much of the light. ]

You'd... completely unmake him? Truly? Him and... everything he's done?

[rikonstructed]

[Nuadha is predictably impassive as he opens the envelope and studies the picture inside. There's not even a flicker of emotion as he puts it away, extremely normal.]

And the consequences of doing that wouldn't be your problem, I suppose.

[squidproquos]

[ Azul doesn't even eat anything from the table. No offense, but he's not taking his chances; he only trusts his own food at the moment.

Still, the motive sitting there is quite enticing. He grabs the envelope, gingerly opening it and looking at the picture. His poker face doesn't change, having been honed over time due to all the deals he's made. But then, he lets out a little chuckle before sliding the photo back in the envelope and putting it in his inner suit pocket. ]

Creative, but not appealing to me.

[guffawsungraciously]

[he's been quietly watching everything happening so much as he pours himself a glass of lemonade and makes himself a plate.

You know, for fun.]

So much for everyone surviving the month, I suppose.

[He has not opened his envelope.]